Ciao -

Any place you refer to a past experience limits what we can be & receive in the moment. Any significance you place on anything, good or bad, can limit what you can experience.
When you do sex by past reference points of what it was like then with this person etc...are you truly being present?

No past is always generating the present.

It's cool to orgasm - and, I know for me, when the target is loving and sexing and laughing and not following any agenda, the orgasmic response is soooo greater. No comparison. After experiencing this, orgasm as a target is gone. Bye bye.

This especially includes our female lovers...full body attention, and really following the energy of what their body is asking for.
Being in the question is having no reference point - and allowing their bodies to tell you, to pull you, to invite you, to touch there, to kiss there, to stroke so lightly here.....

No effort, no force, just intensity of energy & intensity of presence.

thanks for your response. What class did you take where you heard some of this stuff? I was actually inviting questions - not leading in for something...thanks though.